We have heard this phrase many times. Consciously or subconsciously, w e have probably said it to ourselves too many times,. This can be a powerful statement to hold us back from living our best life. For others who have achieved their own goal of this position at the “top,” it can be a very true statement. You worked hard to get there, but were not prepared for the physical, mental and emotional pressures of being there.
In the work place, we are expected to perform. We are expected to give and not to say no. We are told in orientations to leave our personal problems at the door. We are expected to shut down a part of our being and work. We don’t feel comfortable talking to management or owners, even if we have a brilliant plan. These corporate rules can lead to our own isolating behaviors.
What if I tell you it IS lonely at the top?
People will be jealous and envious of your success. People will have their hands out for favors and gifts. One look at a company organizational chart will show that as you move up the corporate ladder, the number of peers is reduced exponentially. This negative, internal dialogue is counter-productive to living our authentic lives and enjoying the work we do.
Are you going to hold yourself back from your successes? Are you going to not achieve your goals? Are you willing to withhold your talents and abilities to inspire others because of the few who do not understand?
Believing in negative dialogue is a form of self sabotage
In The Artist’s Way, author Julia Cameron explains how these “negative blurts” block us from achieving our authentic life.* These thoughts play in our head at all the wrong times and there is work we need to do to put a stop to it.
A consistent meditation practice can help us observe this internalized negativity. We are then given an opportunity to ask some fundamental questions?
When did we first hear this?
Who said it to us?
Is it a true statement?
A wonderful benefit of meditation is that it helps us regulate our emotions when they are activated. We can look at our definition of loneliness and being alone – realizing that those two things are not the same. Meditation enables us to get centered and listen to our authentic Selves, as opposed to negative comments we heard decades ago that we play over and over again in our head. We can look at our own fear of success and see where we standing in our own way.
Find a New Support System
When we find ourselves in new circumstances, we need to practice self-care. Part of this self-care is to find a new way to connect with others. As we grow in our role in our workplace, our support system must change because we now have new needs. In this particular situation, we can seek the loving and supporting people in our lives. A simple, guided meditation can help identify these people, who are already in our lives in some way. We can also indentify people who, currently, may not be a large part of our lives, but who possess the qualities of love and support we now seek. We can bring our focus to these individuals and take time to cultivate these relationships.
Create an example of Daily Success
Incorporating a daily exercise practice gives us a tangible success each day. The amount of time spent in a work out not only offers lasting heart and strength benefits, but a daily reflection that you have accomplished a task - a step that has personal, emotional, mental and physical benefits. It is one step in creating a new community of support as you continue to grow along your Path in Life.
Using yoga as an example, you can choose your own level of practice and be around others who are also embracing their own growth and successes. Yoga teaches us to breathe during the challenging parts. It gives us emotional and physical endurance to keep going. It provides a way to turn the negative thought, “I can’t” into “I’m doing it right now.”
It is important to show up for ourselves in order to grow and expand. These tools of yoga and meditation can be just the respite you need to perform at optimum levels. During these practices, the manager can discover creative ways of solving puzzles and challenges in the workplaces. The executive can find a solution to overcoming an obstacle in growing the business. And the authentic You can gain clarity, comfort and peace of mind. Your old toolbox may not work and new tools may be required. I encourage you to meditate and practice yoga, just once, and see how you feel. My hope is that you can incorporate these new tools to help you along your unique Path to your numerous successes. I hope you begin right now.
*Julia Cameron, The Artist’s Way (New York: Penguin Putnam, 1992).